Lube up with Olive Oil

As I've gotten a few questions about my skin moisturizing techniques, here are instructions for all you lovely ladies, gents and babies to lube yourself up with olive oil, so you can have soft skin - chemical free:

  1. Fill a smaller bottle w/ a lotion type-top with Olive Oil from your bigger bottle (don't want any slippery glass in the bano).  I use a jumbo glass bottle of extra-virgin (but not the fanciest kind.  I save "First Cold pressed" for cooking).
  2. Stand on a bath mat so you don't slip on spilled oil
  3. If you have long hair, pin it up (oil from lubing up your back can get into your hair and make you look homeless, or, just like me after days of not showering)
  4. After you towel off from the shower or bath, apply the olive oil in quarter size portions all over your body.  Rub it in like you would lotion, but expect it to be a bit shinier and greasier
  5. Stay naked if you can for a few minutes so the oil absorbs
  6. Put on a robe to catch any residual oil from getting on your clothes (had an incident w/ a white blouse on way to work once)
  7. If you are going to bed for the night instead of going out into public, put a bunch of oil on your feet, then put on some cuddly socks.  Also, try putting some on your face, neck and lips (don't plan on getting any action w/ this face-job at first).  I do the face thing about once a week.  If you suffer from dry hair (not me), you could put the oil in your hair.  Sometimes I put it on the ends if I run out of hair creme and have fly-a-ways.
  8. To maximize dry skin eradication, try "Dry skin brushing" before you shower.