Yep, I did it. I delivered my baby at home. Many of you thought I was crazy or just plain stupid. Others just couldn't fathom the logistics of how it all would come about. But I will tell you, it was the most incredible experience of my life. Here is what happened, as explained through a series of frequently asked questions:
You're such a weirdo! Only crazy hippies like you have home births, right?
Maybe I'm the only person YOU know who has had a home birth, but according to the Journal of Midwifery and Women's Health, the number of home births in the US rose 41% between 2004, which is about 1% of all births. Home births continue to be popular in Europe. Roughly 30% of Dutch women deliver at home, and 8% of Brits do so.
Did you have a midwife?
I had several, actually. I saw the amazing ladies at Gentle Birth Care throughout my pregnancy for my prenatal care in one of their two convenient office locations. The head certified nurse midwife (CNM) attended my birth, and her midwife-in-training (also a nurse) would have as well if I wouldn't have delivered so fast! She arrived on the scene shortly after I delivered.
Did you have a doula?
Yes, we hired a doula, one specializing in home birth (vs. a hospital only doula), to be my labor coach. She supported both myself and my husband during labor and delivery and also helped us after the baby was born. She gave me pain relieving massage, helped soothe my nausea with peppermint oil, best positioned me for each contraction, brought me food and communicated with the midwife before she got there. Best of all, she comforted me and my husband throughout the hardest part of labor, and gave me the boost of confidence I needed to deliver my baby.
Isn't home birth dangerous? What if something went wrong?
My chances were roughly 1 in 10 that I would have needed to be transferred to a hospital at the onset of labor - meaning something was really wrong. Conversely, I had a 1 in 3 chance of having a cesarean surgery (major surgery) by giving birth in a hospital, and a 42% of having labor artificially induced. I did not want a c-section. I did not want to be induced, doubling my risk of c-section (Source: Evidence Based birth - see chart below).
Home birth is not dangerous, but only low risk women would be permitted to have a home birth. Throughout my pregnancy, my midwives tested me for several conditions that would have eliminated my prospect for a home birth and forced a hospital birth. If complications at any point during my labor arose, I would have been transferred to a local hospital just 8 blocks away. where I preregistered earlier in my pregnancy, just in case. Western medicine is amazing and hospitals are there for emergencies. Since giving birth is not an emergency, I didn't go to one.
A study from the Midwives Alliance of North American Statistics Project (MANA Stats) 2.0 data registry measured outcomes of planned home births and found:
Yes I did. We rented a hospital-grade birthing tub with disposable liner for the big day ($200), and picked it up 2 months before my due date. We purchased a brand new garden hose with a special washer that connected it to our shower head in the master bathroom adjacent to the family room, where we placed the tub. When my labor began, my husband turned our water heater up to "high" so we would have enough hot water to fill the tub when necessary.
Funny thing: we borrowed an air pump from friends to fill the tub. The evening before I went into labor, our friends needed the pump back to fill their air mattress for their visiting guests, promising to return it in the morning. Needless to say, my husband had to go and pick it up at 3am after my water broke! We should of had a more professional-grade pump, too. The pump kept overheating on my poor husband, and at one point, he almost resorted to blowing up the tub with his own lung power! Recognizing his distress, I shouted out to him mid-contraction, "Don't worry about the tub, honey!"
He eventually got it blown up, and I was so relieved when he did. Dipping into the hot water provided immediate pain relief, but also slowed my labor (this turned out to be a good thing for us). As my doula said, you save the tub for the big moment of actual delivery, otherwise labor could stall.
Labor and delivery is so painful. Why wouldn't you want an epidural?
I'm no hero when it comes to pain. I take Aleve for muscle aches, especially period cramps. I take pain relievers for broken bones, root canals, headaches, hangovers, etc. But these health reasons are for pain signaling something is wrong. The "pain" of labor is designed to let you know when good things are happening to your body, like dilation and stretching of your cervix. I welcomed the pain of contractions as it represented the eminent birth of my baby. I wanted to feel his progress as he prepared to enter this world. The pain of labor had rhyme and reason, and it only lasted half a day.
I went through 39 weeks of pregnancy NOT taking any pain relievers, cold medicine, drinking alcohol, or eating lunch meat, French cheese, sushi, NOTHING! After all that time, dedication and commitment to carrying a healthy, drug free baby, I didn't want to come to the precipice of birth and get an epidural or spinal block, both very strong drugs that studies have shown do reach the baby (Golub, M.S., (1996). Labor analgesia and infant brain development. Pharmacology and Biochemical Behavior, 55(4), 619-628.), just because I was uncomfortable or in pain for a day. I viewed my drug-free delivery as the gift I gave my son for his birthday.
I couldn't do what you did. I needed the drugs.
Going drug free isn't for everybody, and I have no ill judgment of pregnant women who take pain medication during labor and delivery. I just made a different choice for myself and my baby. I believe every woman can go drug-free if they want to. I'm not special. Women tell me, I couldn't have delivered without pain meds, it was too painful. But these are the same women who made the decision to have pain relieving drugs before they went into labor.
If you walk into an ice cream shop with the intention of ordering a salad, then act surprised when you walk out with a hot fudge sundae instead, you don't know yourself very well. We women don't change our minds once they're set on something (at least pregnant women don't around food!). Studies have shown, if you think you can't do it without drugs, you won't do it without drugs. If you think labor and birth will be the most horrifically painful and awful experience of your life, it probably will be.
Wait, you didn't monitor the baby's heartbeat during labor?
The use of electronic fetal monitoring is not practiced in home birth. Midwives use non-invasive fetal doppler's instead to listen to the baby's heartbeat instead of having a monitor strapped to a mother's belly or inserted into a fetus' scalp. The practice of doppler's instead of EFM actually results in less C-sections. Why? If you rely on a machine to tell you what's going on with mama and baby, you're going to interpret things differently than if you're using a woman's behavior and checking of the baby's heart rate intermittently. When contractions happen, the baby's heart rate increases, which can be alarming, but it doesn't mean you need a c-section.
My water broke at 2:30am, and I delivered just after 1pm that same day. Time is typically arbitrary with labor, as it's normal to have labor pains for many days. We get caught up on "how long", I think, because hospitals and insurance companies start the clock upon your arrival. But at home, none of that matters. Your birthing team stays with you the whole time, no matter how long it takes - no shift changes.
I anticipated a long labor because this was my first baby, and statistically speaking, first time moms labor longer. But 10.5 hours is really fast! I tried to sleep after my water broke, and got out of bed at 7:30am when my cramping got too uncomfortable ("early labor" was like strong, intermittent period cramps for me). The doula came over at 9am to check up on us, and ended up staying because I had moved into "active labor" by that time.
My contractions weren't very regular. Sometimes they would last for 30 seconds, sometimes a minute or more. The midwife typically comes over at "411" (Contractions four (4) minutes apart, lasting one (1) minute, for at least one (1) hour). But that never happened. Instead, I was in active labor for about four hours.
I admit I had fleeting moments of wishing I had an epidural, thinking I couldn't take the pain for any longer. I had a difficult time seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. But for the most part, I was really letting myself be in the moment and deal with each contraction individually. Each time one finished was a mini-victory, and the confidence from finishing one, helped me tackle the next one. I can honestly say, at no time was I afraid. I felt very prepared for this moment, reading every book and blog and watching every documentary I could to feel ready.
In the late third hour, we called the midwife and she listened to one of my contractions. She thought they sounded close, but she didn't realize how close! She told the doula to check and see how far dilated I was (that hadn't been done as of yet due to risk of infection from broken waters, and doulas don't typically perform this procedure. My doula was a trained midwife as well, but not a nurse). Instead of checking my cervix, she saw the baby's head!!!
The joy and relief I felt at hearing this news! All of the pain left my body and a big smile spread across my face. I could see the light at the end of the tunnel - I was going to meet my baby soon!
How long did you push?
I could feel my body pushing with each contraction during active labor. There was no point when I gritted my teeth and proactively pushed to get the baby out, like in the movies, like what doctors and nurses tell women who are numb from the waist down. I had no control over my pushing. It happened whether I wanted it to or not. It made me think about all of the energy women expend in the hospital when women are grunting for hours to get a baby out. My body did it for me, and because I wasn't medicated, my head and pelvis were in sync and nobody had to tell me to push.
Did you deliver in the water?
After the doula saw the baby's head, I stayed in the water and tried to relax as much as I could to prevent more pushing contractions until the midwife could arrive. She was about 5 minutes away. We kept her on speakerphone so she could instruct the doula and my husband on what to do in case she couldn't make it in time. We could hear her swearing as she swerved through traffic, running several street lights! It was pretty funny, and I was literally laughing in the tub. My husband found none of this amusing, and he kept running up and down the stairs to the front door checking for her arrival. His job was to flag her down and let her in and he took it very seriously.
But I couldn't wait any longer, and told my doula so. I could feel the baby "turtle heading" in and out and I just knew my next contraction would be the one to push him out. She asked me, "Do you want to catch your baby?" My husband and I discussed this a lot, and I had offered the honor to him. The circumstances didn't allow for this pomp, and it really was my dream to catch our baby (I think the idea kind of grossed him out a bit). So I got on my knees and waited for my next contraction.
At that moment, the midwife ran up the stairs and threw on her gloves (Simultaneously, my indoor cats escaped out the front door and my husband was outside wrangling them). My contraction came, and I could feel the baby slide out. I reached down and pulled him up out of the water and hugged him to my chest. It was the most amazing feeling in the world!
I had a rush of euphoria mixed with exhaustion. I could feel my heart racing faster than ever before. I was feeling the "love hormone" effect. This is what was happening:
You're such a weirdo! Only crazy hippies like you have home births, right?
Maybe I'm the only person YOU know who has had a home birth, but according to the Journal of Midwifery and Women's Health, the number of home births in the US rose 41% between 2004, which is about 1% of all births. Home births continue to be popular in Europe. Roughly 30% of Dutch women deliver at home, and 8% of Brits do so.
 |
| Percentage of births occurring out-of-hospital: United States, 1990–2012
NOTE: Out-of-hospital births include those occurring in a home,
birthing center, clinic or doctor's office, or other location.
SOURCE: CDC/NCHS, National Vital Statistics System, birth certificate data.
|
Why didn't you want to have a baby in a hospital?
When I visualized my perfect birth, it included the ability to be in a warm, comfortable environment, surrounded by supportive, loving people who respected my birth plan. I also wanted to be free from drugs, not attached to any wires or IVs so I could move around as I wished, and I wanted to eat if I was hungry, and drink if I was thirsty. It was important to me to be able to hold and nurse my baby without hospital staff whisking him away from me to weigh or clean him. Having my own pillows, blankets and bathroom was also a plus.Did you have a midwife?
I had several, actually. I saw the amazing ladies at Gentle Birth Care throughout my pregnancy for my prenatal care in one of their two convenient office locations. The head certified nurse midwife (CNM) attended my birth, and her midwife-in-training (also a nurse) would have as well if I wouldn't have delivered so fast! She arrived on the scene shortly after I delivered.
Did you have a doula?
Yes, we hired a doula, one specializing in home birth (vs. a hospital only doula), to be my labor coach. She supported both myself and my husband during labor and delivery and also helped us after the baby was born. She gave me pain relieving massage, helped soothe my nausea with peppermint oil, best positioned me for each contraction, brought me food and communicated with the midwife before she got there. Best of all, she comforted me and my husband throughout the hardest part of labor, and gave me the boost of confidence I needed to deliver my baby.
Isn't home birth dangerous? What if something went wrong?
My chances were roughly 1 in 10 that I would have needed to be transferred to a hospital at the onset of labor - meaning something was really wrong. Conversely, I had a 1 in 3 chance of having a cesarean surgery (major surgery) by giving birth in a hospital, and a 42% of having labor artificially induced. I did not want a c-section. I did not want to be induced, doubling my risk of c-section (Source: Evidence Based birth - see chart below).
Home birth is not dangerous, but only low risk women would be permitted to have a home birth. Throughout my pregnancy, my midwives tested me for several conditions that would have eliminated my prospect for a home birth and forced a hospital birth. If complications at any point during my labor arose, I would have been transferred to a local hospital just 8 blocks away. where I preregistered earlier in my pregnancy, just in case. Western medicine is amazing and hospitals are there for emergencies. Since giving birth is not an emergency, I didn't go to one.
A study from the Midwives Alliance of North American Statistics Project (MANA Stats) 2.0 data registry measured outcomes of planned home births and found:
- ✦Among 16,924 women planning a home birth at the onset of labor, 94% had a vaginal birth, and fewer than 5% required oxytocin augmentation or epidural analgesia (artificial induction).
- ✦11% of women who went into labor intending to give birth at home transferred to the hospital during labor; failure to progress was the primary reason for intrapartum transfer.
- ✦Nearly 1100 women attempted a vaginal birth after cesarean (VBAC) in this sample, with a total VBAC success rate of 87%.
Yes I did. We rented a hospital-grade birthing tub with disposable liner for the big day ($200), and picked it up 2 months before my due date. We purchased a brand new garden hose with a special washer that connected it to our shower head in the master bathroom adjacent to the family room, where we placed the tub. When my labor began, my husband turned our water heater up to "high" so we would have enough hot water to fill the tub when necessary.
Funny thing: we borrowed an air pump from friends to fill the tub. The evening before I went into labor, our friends needed the pump back to fill their air mattress for their visiting guests, promising to return it in the morning. Needless to say, my husband had to go and pick it up at 3am after my water broke! We should of had a more professional-grade pump, too. The pump kept overheating on my poor husband, and at one point, he almost resorted to blowing up the tub with his own lung power! Recognizing his distress, I shouted out to him mid-contraction, "Don't worry about the tub, honey!"
He eventually got it blown up, and I was so relieved when he did. Dipping into the hot water provided immediate pain relief, but also slowed my labor (this turned out to be a good thing for us). As my doula said, you save the tub for the big moment of actual delivery, otherwise labor could stall.
Labor and delivery is so painful. Why wouldn't you want an epidural?
I'm no hero when it comes to pain. I take Aleve for muscle aches, especially period cramps. I take pain relievers for broken bones, root canals, headaches, hangovers, etc. But these health reasons are for pain signaling something is wrong. The "pain" of labor is designed to let you know when good things are happening to your body, like dilation and stretching of your cervix. I welcomed the pain of contractions as it represented the eminent birth of my baby. I wanted to feel his progress as he prepared to enter this world. The pain of labor had rhyme and reason, and it only lasted half a day.
I went through 39 weeks of pregnancy NOT taking any pain relievers, cold medicine, drinking alcohol, or eating lunch meat, French cheese, sushi, NOTHING! After all that time, dedication and commitment to carrying a healthy, drug free baby, I didn't want to come to the precipice of birth and get an epidural or spinal block, both very strong drugs that studies have shown do reach the baby (Golub, M.S., (1996). Labor analgesia and infant brain development. Pharmacology and Biochemical Behavior, 55(4), 619-628.), just because I was uncomfortable or in pain for a day. I viewed my drug-free delivery as the gift I gave my son for his birthday.
I couldn't do what you did. I needed the drugs.
Going drug free isn't for everybody, and I have no ill judgment of pregnant women who take pain medication during labor and delivery. I just made a different choice for myself and my baby. I believe every woman can go drug-free if they want to. I'm not special. Women tell me, I couldn't have delivered without pain meds, it was too painful. But these are the same women who made the decision to have pain relieving drugs before they went into labor.
If you walk into an ice cream shop with the intention of ordering a salad, then act surprised when you walk out with a hot fudge sundae instead, you don't know yourself very well. We women don't change our minds once they're set on something (at least pregnant women don't around food!). Studies have shown, if you think you can't do it without drugs, you won't do it without drugs. If you think labor and birth will be the most horrifically painful and awful experience of your life, it probably will be.
"Fear of labor pain is one of the most important reasons that make women go for cesarean section...Having an abnormal pregnancy, low knowledge and bitter experience of the previous pregnancies can increase the labor pain while a normal pregnancy, having self esteem, pleasure and relaxation can decrease it and hence make your delivery favorable and if the woman would be pleased and relaxed, without facing real pains, her pain tolerance threshold would be increased.2 In a study which conducted on 288 Swedish women, 28% of them evaluated labor pain as a positive condition and 41% of them considered it as the worst experience that they have.1"
Again, I don't blame anyone for taking drugs. If you experience pain and are at your weakest most vulnerable moment and relief is offered to you, of course you will take it. I like hot fudge sundaes more than anybody. Birthing at home removed the temptation for me to make labor and delivery pain free and memory free.
For me, it was important for me to not be stoned during the most important event if my life. I wanted to savor every moment in case I never have another baby. I'll save being stoned for Will Farrell movies and music festivals. I watched my body in awe of its capacity for 9.5 months. I wanted to be present when my body did the most spectacular thing it was literally made to do.
By the way, if you received pitocin to induce labor, your contractions were WAY worse than any natural contractions I had. There is probably no way I could have labored without drugs if I was induced. But with pitocin comes required electronic fetal monitoring, and usually requires an epidural because of the tremendous amounts of pain it can induce. I didn't want to be induced, be strapped to cords or get an epidural. Yet another reason why I wanted to birth at home.Wait, you didn't monitor the baby's heartbeat during labor?
The use of electronic fetal monitoring is not practiced in home birth. Midwives use non-invasive fetal doppler's instead to listen to the baby's heartbeat instead of having a monitor strapped to a mother's belly or inserted into a fetus' scalp. The practice of doppler's instead of EFM actually results in less C-sections. Why? If you rely on a machine to tell you what's going on with mama and baby, you're going to interpret things differently than if you're using a woman's behavior and checking of the baby's heart rate intermittently. When contractions happen, the baby's heart rate increases, which can be alarming, but it doesn't mean you need a c-section.
"(Electronic fetal monitoring) it prevents women from moving during labour. This means that women may be unable to change positions freely or use a bath to help with comfort and control during labour. It also means that some resources tend to be focused on the needs to constantly interpret the (Electronic fetal monitor) and not on the needs of a woman in labour."How long were you in labor?
My water broke at 2:30am, and I delivered just after 1pm that same day. Time is typically arbitrary with labor, as it's normal to have labor pains for many days. We get caught up on "how long", I think, because hospitals and insurance companies start the clock upon your arrival. But at home, none of that matters. Your birthing team stays with you the whole time, no matter how long it takes - no shift changes.
I anticipated a long labor because this was my first baby, and statistically speaking, first time moms labor longer. But 10.5 hours is really fast! I tried to sleep after my water broke, and got out of bed at 7:30am when my cramping got too uncomfortable ("early labor" was like strong, intermittent period cramps for me). The doula came over at 9am to check up on us, and ended up staying because I had moved into "active labor" by that time.
My contractions weren't very regular. Sometimes they would last for 30 seconds, sometimes a minute or more. The midwife typically comes over at "411" (Contractions four (4) minutes apart, lasting one (1) minute, for at least one (1) hour). But that never happened. Instead, I was in active labor for about four hours.
I admit I had fleeting moments of wishing I had an epidural, thinking I couldn't take the pain for any longer. I had a difficult time seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. But for the most part, I was really letting myself be in the moment and deal with each contraction individually. Each time one finished was a mini-victory, and the confidence from finishing one, helped me tackle the next one. I can honestly say, at no time was I afraid. I felt very prepared for this moment, reading every book and blog and watching every documentary I could to feel ready.
In the late third hour, we called the midwife and she listened to one of my contractions. She thought they sounded close, but she didn't realize how close! She told the doula to check and see how far dilated I was (that hadn't been done as of yet due to risk of infection from broken waters, and doulas don't typically perform this procedure. My doula was a trained midwife as well, but not a nurse). Instead of checking my cervix, she saw the baby's head!!!
The joy and relief I felt at hearing this news! All of the pain left my body and a big smile spread across my face. I could see the light at the end of the tunnel - I was going to meet my baby soon!
How long did you push?
I could feel my body pushing with each contraction during active labor. There was no point when I gritted my teeth and proactively pushed to get the baby out, like in the movies, like what doctors and nurses tell women who are numb from the waist down. I had no control over my pushing. It happened whether I wanted it to or not. It made me think about all of the energy women expend in the hospital when women are grunting for hours to get a baby out. My body did it for me, and because I wasn't medicated, my head and pelvis were in sync and nobody had to tell me to push.
Did you deliver in the water?
After the doula saw the baby's head, I stayed in the water and tried to relax as much as I could to prevent more pushing contractions until the midwife could arrive. She was about 5 minutes away. We kept her on speakerphone so she could instruct the doula and my husband on what to do in case she couldn't make it in time. We could hear her swearing as she swerved through traffic, running several street lights! It was pretty funny, and I was literally laughing in the tub. My husband found none of this amusing, and he kept running up and down the stairs to the front door checking for her arrival. His job was to flag her down and let her in and he took it very seriously.
But I couldn't wait any longer, and told my doula so. I could feel the baby "turtle heading" in and out and I just knew my next contraction would be the one to push him out. She asked me, "Do you want to catch your baby?" My husband and I discussed this a lot, and I had offered the honor to him. The circumstances didn't allow for this pomp, and it really was my dream to catch our baby (I think the idea kind of grossed him out a bit). So I got on my knees and waited for my next contraction.
At that moment, the midwife ran up the stairs and threw on her gloves (Simultaneously, my indoor cats escaped out the front door and my husband was outside wrangling them). My contraction came, and I could feel the baby slide out. I reached down and pulled him up out of the water and hugged him to my chest. It was the most amazing feeling in the world!
I had a rush of euphoria mixed with exhaustion. I could feel my heart racing faster than ever before. I was feeling the "love hormone" effect. This is what was happening:
"During labor, oxytocin stimulates contractions. As each contraction occurs, the pain signals the brain to release more oxytocin, which then increases the contractions. The release of oxytocin and the rhythmic contractions of labor facilitate cervical dilatation, delivery of the baby, and expulsion of the placenta.
The baby also produces oxytocin during an unmedicated labor. Right after birth, both mother and baby experience the positive effects of oxytocin, which is further enhanced by skin-to-skin contact, eye contact, and the initiation of breastfeeding.
Produced in response to pain and stress, endorphins have calming and pain-relieving effects. As labor progresses and pain intensifies, endorphin levels steadily increase in unmedicated labors. Endorphins have natural morphinelike effects, decreasing the perception of pain and creating an altered state of consciousness. As a result, a woman in labor shifts into a more instinctive mindset, which facilitates her ability to cope with the birth process. She is able to "go into the zone" and focus on the work of labor. After labor, high endorphin levels can help a woman feel alert and attentive as she greets her newborn and initiates breastfeeding.
Known as the "fight or flight" hormone, adrenaline is secreted in response to stress, fear, and extreme pain. If a woman feels threatened during labor, such as by fear or extreme pain, she may produce too much adrenaline, which can impede labor. In a natural birth right before delivery, a surge of adrenaline provides the woman with a rush of energy, stimulating contractions and activating the fetal ejection reflex. At birth, high adrenaline levels allow the baby to be wide-eyed and alert when meeting the mother for the first time and helping in the initiation of breastfeeding.
Medical interventions, such as induction and augmentation of labor and the use of pain medications, can interfere with the natural hormonal processes of giving birth. These procedures can sometimes lead to a cascade of interventions that can result in a cesarean birth. By understanding the natural birth process, a woman can work with her healthcare professional to make informed decisions that best fit her situation and childbirth preferences." - Childbirth Graphics
Did your husband miss the birth?
He did, by seconds. But he didn't miss a thing. He was with me every step of the way throughout my pregnancy and labor. He was there to hold me after the birth and to hold the baby. He is so involved in our baby's life, that missing those few seconds seems irrelevant, and I think he feels the same.
What did you do with the placenta?
I ate it. Not like a steak, but I had it encapsulated. My doula provided this service with her commercial-grade equipment. She steamed it with herbs, dried it, pulverized it and put the pills into roughly 120 capsules. She hand-delivered the capsules in a pretty ceramic container three days postpartum, just at the precise moment when baby blues started kicking in. I took 6 pills a day and felt like a new woman after just a few hours.
Why would you eat your placenta?!?!?!?!?
Turns out, humans are the only mammal that doesn't eat their placenta. The placenta nourished my baby during my pregnancy and is filled with nutrients, good hormones and iron. I mildly hemorrhaged after delivery, so the iron in my placenta was essential to my recovery (along with a lot of rest, iron rich food and supplements). Some studies have shown it also helps with hormonal balance and milk production. There is honestly not a lot of research out there to support the benefits of eating your placenta, but if you believe something will help you, placebo can be a very strong thing.
You hemorrhaged?
My body wasn't delivering the placenta for some reason. And my body bled until the placenta came out. So I after we let the cord blood pulse to the baby for about 5 minutes or so, I handed my son to my now shirtless husband to have skin-to-skin bonding time while I crawled out of the tub to get onto the floor. The doula gave me a shot of pitocin in my thigh and I immediately started contracting. But it felt VERY different. My midwife instructed me to push, unlike before. I had to stereo-typically grunt-push to get the placenta out. What a cool, weird feeling when it comes out, by the way.
What did you do with the water from the tub?
Part of the service of the midwives and the doula is to clean up after the delivery, as if nothing had occurred in our home. They drained the tub with the hose into our toilet. This probably made my master plumber father roll in his grave, but it did the trick, and I was none the wiser of the messy clean up required.
But what about the rest of the mess from the other "fluids"?
We were prepared for anything. Months before my due date, I ordered a birth kit required by my midwives from an online store. In it was almost everything I would need during labor and postpartum, including giant garbage bags for cleanup. I also purchased required materials individually, such as cheap towels, a plastic shower curtain to put under an old fitted sheet on my bed, and tarps to keep the carpet dry around the tub. All of the birth messiness was mostly contained to the water, and I laid on Chux underpads for the placenta delivery and stitches. The midwives and doula cleaned up everything and threw away all the yucky stuff. My house looked as good as new when they left 5 hours post-delivery.
Stitches? Did the midwife do that for you?
Yes, she gave me 6 stitches after I had a nice long cuddle with my baby (Midwives do not practice episiotomies unless it is absolutely necessary). She sprayed Lidocane on my vagina to ease the pain before the stitches. Yes, it hurt, but not as much as the contractions did. Honestly, I was riding my oxytocin high at that point, so the pain didn't bother me at all. The midwife assistant and doula each held a leg, and I told random stories and we all laughed a lot during the process while my husband napped with our baby. I was just so happy to have my baby, the stitches seemed minor at that point.
Would you do it again?
In a heartbeat. I've never felt more accomplished and proud of myself as I did after giving birth. I wish every woman could feel as great about childbirth as I did.
Would you change anything?
It's a pretty funny story about my labor coming so fast, a week early, the tub pump barely working and the cat wrangling that was happening during delivery. But I would buy a better pump and have the tub ready to go 3 weeks before my due date. It also would have been nice for my hubby to have seen the actual delivery.
My mom hears this story and is outraged that my midwife wasn't there for my labor, monitoring me and the baby throughout active labor. She had two "emergency c-sections" and birth is a very scary thing for her and most women in my life. I wasn't concerned about my midwife's later arrival, and instinctively just knew everything was going to be OK. Maybe I'm naive, but I have never thought about all of the bad things that could have happened. Perhaps that's also why I am a perfect home birth candidate.
Was your OBGYN supportive of your home birth?
I have an incredible gynecologist that I see when not pregnant (although certified nurse midwives can also provide annual pelvic exams, family planning, routine gynecological care for things like urinary tract infections). I told him all along about my home birth plans. He was incredibly supportive (even though one of his nurses was not, to which he scolded her for later) and even said he would watch my birth video. He told me how proud of me he was for having my dream birth and healthy outcome.
Wow, you are really into this birthing stuff.
I am really passionate about maternal health and women's reproductive rights. All too often, I have seen my incredibly healthy and well-intentioned friends and family members have traumatic birth experiences. Unwanted c-sections, multiple day, very painful labors from being induced, long term back pain from epidurals, babies in intensive care with breathing problems, and health care professionals who aren't respectful of their wishes or explaining themselves and their actions very clearly. Worst of all, they aren't walking away feeling empowered and proud that they performed a miraculous feat.
As Ina May Gaskin, famous midwife, says, "If a woman doesn’t look like a goddess during labor, then someone isn’t treating her right.”
Why is being informed so important?
You may not know it, but the US is not the safest place in the world to have a baby, even though we spend a heckuvalot of money on our healthcare.
I don't have time to spend doing all the research you have done
We spend more time researching shoes, cars and preschools than we do choosing our birth plan and providers. My dream for women is to take back control of your birth from the hospital and it's staff, and have the birth you want, on your terms. To demand more of a birth outcome than just "the baby making it out alive."
It all starts with you. Women armed with information is a powerful tool to make change. Take this power and decide what you want for yourself and your baby.
He did, by seconds. But he didn't miss a thing. He was with me every step of the way throughout my pregnancy and labor. He was there to hold me after the birth and to hold the baby. He is so involved in our baby's life, that missing those few seconds seems irrelevant, and I think he feels the same.
What did you do with the placenta?
I ate it. Not like a steak, but I had it encapsulated. My doula provided this service with her commercial-grade equipment. She steamed it with herbs, dried it, pulverized it and put the pills into roughly 120 capsules. She hand-delivered the capsules in a pretty ceramic container three days postpartum, just at the precise moment when baby blues started kicking in. I took 6 pills a day and felt like a new woman after just a few hours.
Why would you eat your placenta?!?!?!?!?
Turns out, humans are the only mammal that doesn't eat their placenta. The placenta nourished my baby during my pregnancy and is filled with nutrients, good hormones and iron. I mildly hemorrhaged after delivery, so the iron in my placenta was essential to my recovery (along with a lot of rest, iron rich food and supplements). Some studies have shown it also helps with hormonal balance and milk production. There is honestly not a lot of research out there to support the benefits of eating your placenta, but if you believe something will help you, placebo can be a very strong thing.
You hemorrhaged?
My body wasn't delivering the placenta for some reason. And my body bled until the placenta came out. So I after we let the cord blood pulse to the baby for about 5 minutes or so, I handed my son to my now shirtless husband to have skin-to-skin bonding time while I crawled out of the tub to get onto the floor. The doula gave me a shot of pitocin in my thigh and I immediately started contracting. But it felt VERY different. My midwife instructed me to push, unlike before. I had to stereo-typically grunt-push to get the placenta out. What a cool, weird feeling when it comes out, by the way.
What did you do with the water from the tub?
Part of the service of the midwives and the doula is to clean up after the delivery, as if nothing had occurred in our home. They drained the tub with the hose into our toilet. This probably made my master plumber father roll in his grave, but it did the trick, and I was none the wiser of the messy clean up required.
But what about the rest of the mess from the other "fluids"?
We were prepared for anything. Months before my due date, I ordered a birth kit required by my midwives from an online store. In it was almost everything I would need during labor and postpartum, including giant garbage bags for cleanup. I also purchased required materials individually, such as cheap towels, a plastic shower curtain to put under an old fitted sheet on my bed, and tarps to keep the carpet dry around the tub. All of the birth messiness was mostly contained to the water, and I laid on Chux underpads for the placenta delivery and stitches. The midwives and doula cleaned up everything and threw away all the yucky stuff. My house looked as good as new when they left 5 hours post-delivery.
Stitches? Did the midwife do that for you?
Yes, she gave me 6 stitches after I had a nice long cuddle with my baby (Midwives do not practice episiotomies unless it is absolutely necessary). She sprayed Lidocane on my vagina to ease the pain before the stitches. Yes, it hurt, but not as much as the contractions did. Honestly, I was riding my oxytocin high at that point, so the pain didn't bother me at all. The midwife assistant and doula each held a leg, and I told random stories and we all laughed a lot during the process while my husband napped with our baby. I was just so happy to have my baby, the stitches seemed minor at that point.
In a heartbeat. I've never felt more accomplished and proud of myself as I did after giving birth. I wish every woman could feel as great about childbirth as I did.
Would you change anything?
It's a pretty funny story about my labor coming so fast, a week early, the tub pump barely working and the cat wrangling that was happening during delivery. But I would buy a better pump and have the tub ready to go 3 weeks before my due date. It also would have been nice for my hubby to have seen the actual delivery.
My mom hears this story and is outraged that my midwife wasn't there for my labor, monitoring me and the baby throughout active labor. She had two "emergency c-sections" and birth is a very scary thing for her and most women in my life. I wasn't concerned about my midwife's later arrival, and instinctively just knew everything was going to be OK. Maybe I'm naive, but I have never thought about all of the bad things that could have happened. Perhaps that's also why I am a perfect home birth candidate.
Was your OBGYN supportive of your home birth?
I have an incredible gynecologist that I see when not pregnant (although certified nurse midwives can also provide annual pelvic exams, family planning, routine gynecological care for things like urinary tract infections). I told him all along about my home birth plans. He was incredibly supportive (even though one of his nurses was not, to which he scolded her for later) and even said he would watch my birth video. He told me how proud of me he was for having my dream birth and healthy outcome.
Wow, you are really into this birthing stuff.
I am really passionate about maternal health and women's reproductive rights. All too often, I have seen my incredibly healthy and well-intentioned friends and family members have traumatic birth experiences. Unwanted c-sections, multiple day, very painful labors from being induced, long term back pain from epidurals, babies in intensive care with breathing problems, and health care professionals who aren't respectful of their wishes or explaining themselves and their actions very clearly. Worst of all, they aren't walking away feeling empowered and proud that they performed a miraculous feat.
As Ina May Gaskin, famous midwife, says, "If a woman doesn’t look like a goddess during labor, then someone isn’t treating her right.”
Why is being informed so important?
You may not know it, but the US is not the safest place in the world to have a baby, even though we spend a heckuvalot of money on our healthcare.
- The US has the highest first-day infant death rate out of all the industrialized countries in the world.
- One third of American women are having C-sections (see first chart above), 60% higher than 1996 at 20.7% (source: CDC).
- The US has a higher ratio of maternal deaths than at least 40 other countries, even though it spends more money per capita for maternity care than any other.
- Maternal deaths could be prevented half the time:
"The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) reported in 1998 that more than half of [maternal] deaths could have been prevented (Johnson & Rutledge, 1998)—surely, a conservative estimate. In that same publication, the CDC admitted that not only had there been no improvement in the maternal death ratio since 1982, but also the officially reported ratio was a substantial underestimate because there are so many classification errors in the system. A recent article in a major obstetrical journal revealed a 93% underreporting rate of maternal death in Massachusetts (DeneuxTharaux et aI., 2005)." -Ina May Gaskin
I don't have time to spend doing all the research you have done
We spend more time researching shoes, cars and preschools than we do choosing our birth plan and providers. My dream for women is to take back control of your birth from the hospital and it's staff, and have the birth you want, on your terms. To demand more of a birth outcome than just "the baby making it out alive."
It all starts with you. Women armed with information is a powerful tool to make change. Take this power and decide what you want for yourself and your baby.